#lucy tries to write

[lucy-sky]

Friends and Benefits (Julian Kaye x f!Reader)

"You’ve never had that many friends, especially straight male ones. But somehow with Julian it was so easy. In a way, everyone in the escort business are actors and actresses. You play roles, depending on your client needs and requests, and at some point you get so used to it that you keep on playing even after the client leaves. With Julian, for the first time in ages you suddenly felt like yourself. He didn’t try to hit on you, and it was fine - you weren’t sure you needed a relationship at the time. You just genuinely liked each other, had a lot in common, and enjoyed each other’s company. There was a pinch of flirting between the two of you, but nothing more than that, and the both of you were okay with it."

This was supposed to an innocent night at your place, you and Julian just drinking, talking and chilling. A suddenly revealed fact about you leads to an offer that's gonna make the night way spicier.

Prompt: “Keep your eyes open, look at me, baby.” with Julian Kaye?

Warnings: the reader is in the escort buisiness as well as Julian; obviously smut

Words: 2 829; AO3 link

A/N: This is written for @bernthirst-events Naughty or Nice Prompt Fest 2023, and it's probably not great because I got super rusty. Last time i wrote something more than 1K words was on January 14th. So I apologize in advance :')

“Wait, wait, wait. No way. You serious?”

“Uh-huh,” you nod, taking a deep drag of the cigarette Julian just handed you.

“Not even once?”

“Nope. Okay, well… There were a couple of times I was close, you know, like… Really fucking close. But that’s it, believe it or not.”

When a couple of colleagues who also happen to be good friends meet up, what do they usually talk about? Right. Of course they talk about work. You and Julian are no exception, even considering your job. 

You met Julian Kaye about a year ago. At first you noticed each other at some fancy event you both attended with clients. You didn’t even need to ask him about his job, as well as he didn’t need to ask you either. People like you just know. For a while you kept seeing him here and there, he recognized you as well, but you didn’t really have a chance to talk. And then, on your night-off, you went out with the girls and saw him at the bar. Since he didn’t seem to be at work, you decided to finally come say hi. You ended up talking until closing hour.

You’ve never had that many friends, especially straight male ones. But somehow with Julian it was so easy. In a way, everyone in the escort business are actors and actresses. You play roles, depending on your client needs and requests, and at some point you get so used to it that you keep on playing even after the client leaves. With Julian, for the first time in ages you suddenly felt like yourself. He didn’t try to hit on you, and it was fine - you weren’t sure you needed a relationship at the time. You just genuinely liked each other, had a lot in common, and enjoyed each other’s company. There was a pinch of flirting between the two of you, but nothing more than that, and the both of you were okay with it.

Since then, no matter how busy you are, you and Julian try to meet up at least once a month. Sometimes you go to the bar or a party, but tonight you’re not really in the mood for a crowd, so you invited him to your apartment. Sitting on rocking chairs on your balcony (you bought them in a thrift store, and Julian likes to make fun of you having these rocking chairs like an old lady, but you know he loves them as much as you do), you drink wine, smoke, watch the city lights and talk.

As always, it started with funny stories about work. Julian told you about that time he almost got bitten by his client’s angry chihuahua, and you told him how a couple of weeks ago you had to hide from an unexpectedly arrived wife in a closet like in a bad anecdote. And as always, the more you drink, the more intimate your conversation gets. At some point you start to share your clients’ and your turn ons and offs, and you complain that most men get really turned on when the woman orgasms, and at the same time they’re totally unable to actually make her come.

“It’s ugh… They don’t even try! I mean… I can’t name any guy who made me come, to be completely honest.”

You said it just casually, but this sudden confession surprised Julian more than you expected.

“No way.”

“Oh yes way,” you laugh. “But like… You know I didn’t have any serious relationships. When I had my first boyfriend we were too young, and then… Kinda complicated considering the business, am I right? So it’s been a while since I had sex without being paid. And when you do that for work… Tell me how many of your clients actually cared for your pleasure, huh?”

“Yeah, guess you’re right,” Julian nods with a slightly bitter chuckle.

“I don’t blame them though. They pay for our service to please themselves. To be selfish. Desired. To not be judged. They don’t have to impress us, it’s just an easy way to feel the greatest and the hottest lover ever. So yeah, it’s not my fault I don’t come with them,” you take one more drag of your cigarette. “Although… You know, actually that’s something about me as well…”

“Nah, come on, there’s nothing wrong about you, sweetheart, it’s-”

“I didn’t say there’s something wrong about me, J,” you cut him off. “The thing is, when I work I always have to be in control. It’s like uh… It’s like a show, you know. Like I’m on stage, so I just can’t relax and lose it, you know what I mean?”

“I do, yeah.”

“So like… It is what it is,” you shrug. “Not a big deal. There’s plenty of ways I can please myself when I need to. And as for work… At least I know my show’s a damn good one,” you smirk.

“No doubts about that,” he returns a smile.

The conversation fades for a few moments, while Julian refills the glasses. You already feel tipsy, not too much, just relaxed and pleasantly warm despite the night air getting a bit chilly.

“You know,” Julian suddenly says, “Some of my clients tell me they keep seeing me because they’re tired of pretending. Husbands can’t make them feel good, and don’t really care ‘bout that, but I do.”

“Yeah, yeah. The sex is not exciting any more, so the husband calls me, and the wife calls you, and everyone is happy,” you chuckle. “It’s way easier than doing something about the relationship after all. Funny that they mostly think they’re doing it secretly, but everyone knows anyways.”

“One of them told me she already thought she couldn’t enjoy sex any more,” he continues, faint smirk on his lips.

“Oh, so now you’re showing off, Mister Sexy!” you laugh, giving him a light punch on the shoulder.

“I mean… It is what it is,” he shrugs with that adorable boyish laugh of his.

“I know you’re good, J,” you say it more seriously than expected.

“Yeah, uh… You know what, y/n… I just thought of something…”

“Yes?” you glance at him curiously.

“Pretty sure I could make you come for real.”

“What?” you almost choke on your wine, “Is that like… An offer?”

“Maybe.”

You notice that slight change in his voice and the way he looks at you. Somehow it gives you a strange tingle. You feel your cheeks warm up.

“You serious? And uh… Why’d you wanna do this? ‘Cause I already told you it’s not a big deal, so if you feel pity for me or something-”

“No, that’s not it, it-it’s just,” he stumbles a little, “When you said it’s been a while since you had sex without being paid… It’s been a while for me as well, and… You know what, forget it,” Julian shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair with an awkward smile. “Guess I’m just drunk already.”

“Actually I don’t mind.”

You surprise yourself when these words tumble from your lips. Guess you’re drunk too, but there’s definitely a sort of chemistry between the two of you that could work. You’ve always found Julian attractive, and the way he looks at you makes you think it’s mutual. Maybe you’ll regret this in the morning, but right now the idea of having casual sex with Julian Kaye doesn’t seem all that bad.

“Really?” Julian stares at you, his dark eyes scanning your expression. “You wanna?..”

“Yeah,” you breathe out.

He doesn’t say anything, just gets up off his chair, approaches and kneels next to you. He looks into your eyes for a few moments before bringing his hand to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. Then he reaches your hand and gets up, urging you to get on your feet as well. His fingers gently caress your cheek and the side of your neck before he leans in. He doesn’t capture your lips right away, it’s just a light touch of his nose against yours, a chaste press of lips, a soft lick of his tongue asking for invitation. You part your lips and the kiss is deep and unhurried. It tastes like wine and cigarettes but it’s so blissfully sweet your head is spinning. When did you have a kiss like that last time? Or maybe you’ve never had… Well, he’s a professional after all. It makes you think of something.

“Julian,” you whisper when your lips part, his hand on the back of your neck, foreheads pressed together as you catch a breath.

“Yeah?”

“I have one condition, okay? Let’s try to just be ourselves tonight. Otherwise… What’s the point of all that, am I right?”

“Okay,” his voice is a little husky, and you find it pretty hot.

“Okay,” you reach to get your glass from the table, bring it to your lips and drink down the remains of the wine in one big sip.

“Let’s get inside.”

“You know… You’re actually the first person I invited to this bed,” you murmur in between the kisses. Your clothes are already discarded, except for the underwear, and Julian’s deft fingers are already reaching to unclasp your bra.

“Really, am I?”

“Mhm.”

“That’s quite an honor,” he kisses along your jawline and down the side of your neck. “You smell nice.”

“That body lotion’s my favorite.”

“Like almond cookies,” he bites on your skin gently, careful not to leave the marks. You appreciate that. Sighing with pleasure you let your fingers run through his thick hair, as Julian slowly keeps kissing his way down your body. You must be crazy or too drunk, and maybe you’re on your way to ruin your friendship, but it feels too good to stop. The way he pinches your nipple between his fingers makes you shiver. You shift uncomfortably as the heat rises up in your core. A part of you wants to tell him you need more. Another part wants it to last longer. He continues his descent. Leaves a trail of kisses between your beasts and further down. He licks the skin of your lower belly, right above the waistband of your panties, fingers brushing the inside of your thighs. You still have your panties on, but you feel like you know where it’s going.

“Uhh… J?”

“Yeah?” he glances at you from between your thighs.

“Look… I’m pretty sure you can make me come with your tongue in no time. That’s too easy, man. I wanna come on your cock.”

“Yeah, I’ll make you come on my cock, darlin’, I promise you that,” he chuckles. “Just need to warm you up, you mind that?”

“Alright, do your magic.”

“That’s what I wanna hear,” he smiles, pulling down your underwear. You’re now completely naked, exposed for him, and maybe he’s not the love of your life and not even your boyfriend, but it feels way more intimate than with any client you’ve ever had. Even though there were times a client wanted to go down on you.

“Relax, okay, sweetheart? Will you do that for me?”

That’s it, that’s the difference. A client would never talk to you like that. He would never be that tender. Julian is incredibly good at that. Not that you had any doubts though. He kisses and licks and hums against you as if he’s tasting something absolutely delicious. Your soft moans become louder, fingers tug on his hair as you writhe. And then he adds his fingers to the mix, and your toes curl. 

“J, I… I’m gonna…”

“Shhh, I know, I know, baby,” he whispers soothingly, withdrawing his fingers, dripping with your arousal. “C’mere.”

He moves back up your body and kisses your mouth deeply, to which you eagerly respond.

“You’re enjoying yourself, do you? Making a mess out of me?” you pant as you pull back for air.

“I am, actually,” he admits, brushing your hair away from your heated face. “‘Cause you’re a beautiful mess, you should’ve seen yourself.”

He kisses you again, and you can’t wait any longer. Your hand skims down his belly and under the waistband of his boxers. Oh, you love the sound he makes when you start to slowly pump his length.

“You think we’re warm enough already?” you tease.

“Condoms?”

“Upper drawer.”

It’s impressive how fast Julian manages to get rid of his underpants, find the condom, tear its wrapper with his teeth and put it on with just a bit of assistance from your side. He’s pretty thick, and you can feel it as he slowly pushes inside you. It feels good, especially after all the foreplay.

“You good?” Julian asks as he bottoms out.

“Yeah. You?”

“I’m great,” he smiles and leans in to kiss you again before gently rocking his hips. He’s still unhurried, as if he wants you to get used to it. You suddenly think how nice it would’ve been if your very first sex was like that, not the mess you had with your first partner. Julian Kaye can really make a woman feel special. Although you know he wasn’t always such a talented lover. Everyone has their awkward moments. Everyone has moments they wish they could forget, especially when it comes to your job. It is what it is. There’s no point in regretting it. 

Julian doesn’t let you think about it for too long, he’s busy kissing your neck, breath hot against your skin as he gradually picks up speed. It still doesn’t feel like enough for you to come, but after a few thrusts he urges you to bend your knees a bit more and lift up your legs, and the sudden change of angle almost makes your eyes roll as he hits exactly the right spot.

“That good?” he whispers on your ear when you dig your nails in his shoulders, every thrust causing you to arch your back.

“Mmm… Keep going,” you manage to mumble. Your mind is clouded, walls already fluttering around his length, and it’s getting more and more intense with each snap of his hips. Julian is getting close as well, you can tell from the way he breathes, the noises he makes, his moves getting slightly more erratic. He nips on the crease of your neck and you don’t even care about any possible marks any longer. He’s a hot mess; he’s panting as he presses his forehead against yours and his hand finds its way between your bodies

“Look at me, sweetheart, c’mon. I know you’re close.”

He’s right - you feel like you’re getting close to something completely mind-shattering. With his fingers on your clit and his cock buried so deep within you, hitting what feels like all the sweet spots at once you’re balancing right on the edge.

“Oh fuck, J!..” you moan, throwing your head back.

“Keep your eyes on me, look at me, baby,” he urges you, gripping the back of your neck. “That’s it, just let yourself go, come for me. I know you can.”

You obey, meeting that intense gaze of his dark brown eyes, and finally, as if in response, your body finally gives in. The climax hits you with such a force you think you’re about to pass out. You gush beneath him, gasping and moaning, your walls pulsing and spasming around his length. Through the haze of your bliss you hear Julian’s low grunt as he climaxes too, shuddering against your body. He nuzzles into the crook of your neck, and for a while you just stay like that, holding each other, sweaty and breathless, getting down from your high and still shivering from the aftershocks.

“Hey,” you smile and let your shaky fingers run through his damp hair as he lifts his head to look you in the eye. “That was… Wow.”

“Yeah,” he hums and pecks on your lips.

“I have to return the favor next time.”

“What?” he laughs in surprise. “Nah, sweetheart. You don’t owe me nothing, no favors done.”

“Yeah, but… Come on, J. There must be something you want but don’t get much. Like… How often do you get a blowjob? Or a really nice massage? I’m quite good at that, actually.”

“Okay. You got me at massage.”

“You won’t regret it,” you smirk and lean in to kiss his lips and the bridge of his nose. His thumb caresses your cheekbone, and that soft look in his eyes makes your heart shrink with sudden tenderness towards him. It scares you a little, because it’s so new. You’re not quite sure what to do about it.

“Julian?”

“Mm?”

“We… didn’t just fuck up our friendship, did we?..”

“Course not,” he reassures, pressing a kiss on your forehead. 

“Guess we’re more like friends with benefits now though.”

“I’m fine with that if you are,” he shrugs.

“Okay,” you sigh with relief. “You wanna stay the night?”

“I’d like that.”

Thanks for reading!

No pressure tags: @darlingshane @anna-hawk @munsonownsmyass @itwasthereaminuteago @slavic-empress

[waltongoggos]

Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x Lucy Maclean (pt. 2)

It’s in the in-betweens that she sees the man that Cooper was. He’s unforgiving in parts with his commentary and all help comes with a sarcastic response or wry amusement at watching her stumble into every fuck-up, but he always steps in when he needs to.  Now that they’ve been together long enough, his constant state of giving her some sort of shit has begun to sound affectionate over snide. Like her brother, poking and prodding to rile her up. However, Cooper isn’t Norm, and the easy back and forth they’ve established feels far from the flavor of siblings.  Lucy doesn’t have a lot of experience with what it means to really like someone, to fall in love. She’s familiar with the shape of it, but outside of Chet and the beginning warmth she felt with Max, she’s never known what it means to want to just exist in someone’s space.  But she’s starting to think she’s getting there with Cooper.

[melverie]

Sometimes I'm doing well, and then other times Lucifer's level 30 intimacy phone call in Nightbringer suddenly comes back to mind, and I am once again reminded how Lucifer is so utterly desperate to connect with Satan in any way. It doesn't even have to be meaningful; just having his brother despise him a tiny bit less than before would already be more than enough

And when they finally do make the tiniest, most insignficant amount of progress imaginable, Lucifer is so overjoyed about it that he ends up celebrating with a horn of Demonus......or two, maybe three... Might as well finish the bottle. Let's open another one! And another, and another, and another! We've got to celebrate tonight, after all! Hm? No, he isn't drunk MC, what a stupid question to even ask. Here, he'll drink some more just to prove it! Then after that--!

And all that because he and Satan managed to hold a conversation for a minute longer than usual

[magical-girl-coral]

Rat Grinders D20 season idea: have all the PCs be played by people who have either never played DnD before or haven't played in years to really sale the "a bunch of teenagers wake up after a year of no control over their bodies or the memories of what they did and now they have to deal with being level twenty powerhouses without knowing how they got there" aspect of their characters.

[halucynator]

hi babes! may I request theo + party 💋

party | theo nott ☆

yes you may mwah <3 ive also never written headcanons before so i prolly got it wrong lmao i was also supposed to post this yesterday but i have shit memory :((

• theo HATES parties, but he still goes when you ask him to bc he'd do anything for you (and soft spot)

• "another party? what's the point of these parties?" he'd question shocked at you telling him (and practically forcing him) to come to the 3rd party of the week with you.

• "the point is to loosen up and have fun theo! come on, dont be boring!"

• "okay fine, but this is the last time" he'd lie.

• another reason he'd go to parties is because you'd look absolutely stunning + he'd get to see you more.

• and it makes you happy.

• he always makes sure to tell you how good you look.

• he drinks at the party but only 1 or 2 bc he needs to be sober enough to take care of you if you get too drunk.

• if you get too drunk he takes you up to your dorm and tucks you in.

• if he sees someone trying to flirt with you/take advantage of you when your wasted he drags you away.

• he's probably the 'mom' of the group when it comes to parties.

• he usually just stays in the corner of the room away from the dancing floor.

• as much as he wants to leave, he never does if you're still there bc he takes care of you.

• he's even more overprotective than he usually is at parties bc he knows the dangers.

• whenever you have more than a set amount of drink he usually tries to stop you so you don't have a hangover the next day and bc if he doesn't he'd never hear the end of it.

• "theo" you'd whine "why didn't you stop me from having all those drinks"

• he'd sigh and shake his head.

• "i tried to"

[happilychee]

thinking about aromantic lucy

I saw a terf saying aspec people aren't actually queer so fuck them here's aromantic lucy heartfilia

cw: a few mentions of internalized arophobia

lucy who doesn't know that the word love exists until she reads it in one of the few fairytale books in her father's extensive library. lucy who doesn't quite get the kissing and the physicality and the fiery proclamations, but thinks that it's an okay price to pay for someone to be so passionate for her. to choose her and care about her, like her mother did before she passed.

lucy, who's eight years old and crying after another argument with her father, who summons aquarius and asks "do you love me?" aquarius feels her blood pressure rise, but seeing the broken look in her wielder's watery eyes, she decides to drop the snark. "I do, kid." "does that mean you wanna kiss me?" aquarius almost smacks lucy over the head.

lucy who doesn't quite understand the difference between how she cares for her spirits and how she felt about her mom. lucy who cares deeply for everyone who's important to her, who thinks that aquarius could just as easily be her knight in shining armor as the storybook prince. lucy who reads romance books because she wants someone like that in her life. lucy who's never had any friends besides aquarius. lucy who thinks it must be nice to have someone choose you, care about you, protect you. lucy decides that that's what love is.

lucy who's old enough to know she doesn't like her father. lucy who's so confused when she hates him but still cares about him. lucy who's old enough to run away from home but too young, too young.

lucy who joins fairy tail and has no idea what to expect. lucy who's startled by her new friends' openness and easy acceptance of her. lucy who blushes when natsu throws an arm around her, who feels warm and fuzzy when gray guides her by the small of her back, who has a lopsided grin on her face when erza links arms with her as they walk. lucy who suddenly thinks that she's in love with three people at once and panics (her storybooks never mentioned that!!).

lucy who turns to who she can confidently call her best friend, levy mcgarden, for help. levy sits her down with a cup of hot chocolate and cookies. they talk for hours about sexuality and attraction; lucy sleeps over that night. the word that sticks out the most in her mind is aromantic.

lucy who gets drunk at a party and gets a little too close to cana, and suddenly they're in cana's apartment, making out like there's no tomorrow. lucy who feels guilt creep up in the morning because she knows cana and gray and loke have something going, and she might've just ruined it. lucy who tears up when cana laughs because she's so, so confused. cana's expression morphs into concern and she wipes away her friend's tears, warm skin on skin. cana who tells lucy that what she does with gray and what she does with loke doesn't restrict her from what she does with other people. "we talked about it, I promise." cana reassures her. then, leaning in with a sexy smirk on her face, she whispers, "besides, they're probably jealous I took you home first~" the rush of heat is enough to make lucy's mind go blank with joy.

lucy who shyly asks cana about her relationships and learns so much she feels like her head is going to explode. lucy who has a crisis about her storybooks and her ideal romances. she's never going to have that, she realizes. it feels like someone's scooped out her chest.

lucy whose feelings ebb and flow like the tide. she's not used to this. being so... different. her storybooks are scattered across the floor, thrown in an angry fit. her door is locked, but her window isn't, and that's how natsu gets in. "you okay, luce? we haven’t seen you in a while."

the dam breaks. lucy sobs in natsu's arms, and all she can think is that this is the exact type of hurt/comfort scene she loves in her stories. she wishes she were normal, so she could love normally, so she could love natsu the normal way and be done with it. she doesn't realize she's talking out loud.

natsu cups her face, onyx eyes boring into chocolate ones. he squishes her cheeks together, the way he does when he thinks she's overthinking something. and then, natsu breaks through her entire crisis with three little words.

"does it matter?" he furrows his brow. "you're lucy, and I'm natsu, and I care about you." "but- I don't feel romantic attraction-" natsu huffs, frustrated that lucy's not getting something that's apparently obvious to him. "luce. I care about you, and I trust you, and I want to take care of you and protect you. who cares about anything else?" lucy blinks once, twice, and then she's sobbing again. natsu panics, because he knows he can be blunt and dismissive sometimes, but lucy barrels into him, clutching onto his scarf tightly.

"you care about me?" she whispers in a child's voice. that's more important to her than anything. romantic, platonic, the gray area in between, none of it matters as long as natsu cares.

natsu tightens his grip, wondering who he has to pummel for making his girl feel that way. "course I care about you, dummy. I'd burn down the world for you. and so would erza and gray and cana and everyone else."

lucy who has a really hard time moping when natsu's there every step of the way, trying to cheer her up. erza and gray show up, too, and it's hard to stay sad when she's being tickled by erza while gray cooks dinner and kicks natsu out of her kitchenette.

lucy who feels the hollow fill with something warm and gooey when erza gives her a hug, confessing that she often has trouble figuring out how she feels about anything. lucy laughs when erza tells her about the shenanigans that have happened when she doesn't pick up on someone flirting with her but gray and natsu do. she feels all fuzzy when gray leans against her, telling her that he feels the same way. his hand plays with hers, and she thinks it's nice how well they slot together.

lucy realizes when natsu falls asleep in her lap, arms wrapped protectively around her waist. lucy realizes when gray falls asleep at her side, erza tucked to his chest. lucy realizes that her friends make her feel like she's on top of the world, and she doesn't need a fairytale prince when she's got fairy tail.

[darethshirl]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Fallout (TV 2024) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Cooper Howard | The Ghoul/Lucy MacLean Characters: Cooper Howard | The Ghoul, Lucy MacLean Additional Tags: Humor, Light Angst, Character Study, Bickering, Team Bonding, Crying, Guilt, Late Night Conversations, Daddy Issues, daughter issues, Season 1 Finale Spoilers, cooper howard being a dick, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, not as shippy as i would have liked but i Tried Summary:

Whatever gland was responsible for empathy had long since dried up in Cooper’s heart. He watched Lucy cry, his hand unconsciously petting the dog back and forth, back and forth.

“Come now, sweetheart,” he drawled after a while, “no man is worth your tears.” He picked at his teeth with his free hand, his nail prising out a sliver of charred meat. “Plus, you’re wasting water.”

—

Lucy and the Ghoul negotiate the dynamics of their new alliance. Post season 1 finale.

[harrowscore]

why are you, as an adult in 2024, still hung up on reylo. why are you still mocking the shippers. why do you believe yourself to be superior only because you dislike a stupid ship from a fucking space fairytale. girl (gnc) get a grip

[allbridgesburn]

fic: all your wasteland flowers [chapter v]

the ballad of songbirds and snakes; lucy gray baird/coriolanus snow; R, 5/?

Freedom. 

For the last few years, freedom has been nothing but a fantastical concept to her, a dream far outside her reach. A child’s tale, the kind she tells Mallory before bed.

But it is close now, so close. Almost at the tips of her fingers. Foolishly enough, Lucy Gray begins to hope again.

-

or: Lucy Gray Baird survives Coriolanus Snow. However, she's not the only one. [post-canon]

read @ ao3

[speakofthedebbie]

happy 6 month anniversary to my first ever [hazbin] fic!!! i dry-heave every time i think about you!!!

[ajlockwood]

I love how stroud created a sort of tied ending for the books and symbolised the development of lockwood and lucy’s relationship through necklaces. each one of them is a physical representation of the feelings blossoming between them, and since neither of them is emotionally able to put these feelings into words, I wrote a very tiresome 1700-word essay about that

[WARNING: major spoilers for all five books + the netflix show]

the first necklace is annie ward’s, in the screaming staircase. it’s a locket, a materialisation of a tumultuous love between two people, a toxic passion that leads to tragedy. extreme jealousy led to the loved one’s death. this necklace is a kind of presage of what’s to come in the next books, because from the moment lucy meets annie, she feels a sort of connection to her – that beautiful metaphorical image of lucy and annie underwater in the show speaks for itself – and this will also be reflected on her own romantic story.

this quote was a foreshadowing all along, but we only realise that much further. stroud suggested the importance of the necklaces given as gifts throughout the story – and their romantic meaning that should not be overlooked. (plus keep in mind george’s implication that lucy doesn’t know anything about love. it’s important, I promise).

[in the netflix show, this connection between annie’s relationship with fairfax and lucy’s with lockwood is foreseen when lucy relives annie’s last moments. she begins to caress a conflicted lockwood as if he were her lover, and this moment made it even clearer that even though both relationships were very different, they are correspondent. plus, the locket was replaced by a ring, and they also added a ring on lockwood’s finger. coincidence? I think not. but keep reading, I’ll elaborate on that later.]

the second necklace is a gift from lockwood to lucy in the whispering skull, and is the first one directly connected to their relationship. this necklace is made of silver, meaning purity, healing, patience, perseverance, balance, peace. the diamond too is a symbol of purity, commitment and faithfulness. in short, this is the first material implication that a healthy and easy affection is growing between them. even if it’s for the sake of a case, they’re going to a party, and all is well.

however, here I remind of george’s quote about lucy not knowing anything about love – though I wouldn’t say she’s ignorant, but more like unaware of it. lockwood is also unaware of it. the whole point of locklyle being so good is that they’re unaware of their affection’s depth for 70% of the story even though it’s so OBVIOUS. they’re young, and they work too much – lockwood’s life had been his job until then –, so much that what could have been a lovely moment with his gift is quickly dismissed in the book because they have a mission. so they don’t really have the time and mental health to dwell on it. we don’t have lockwood’s pov in the books (shoutout to mr stroud), and lucy knows she feels something for lockwood but denies it – though later we find that she preferred to keep wearing the necklace full-time.

[the show also made a really important addition by showing lockwood entering jessica’s room to fetch the necklace, an indication that his love for lucy is making him have to face his trauma. and the moment when he gives lucy the necklace was much more meaningful: it was right after lucy had told him for the first time about norrie. he wanted to tell her about jessica as well, but he hesitates – he says, “it belonged to… someone I was very close to.” he wants to open up to her, although he’s still not ready to do so. jessica’s door being opened by the end of the book/season is obviously a metaphor for the door to his inner self, and just when he is ready to at least try leaving a crack for lucy to enter, stroud wrote the next book.]

the hollow boy is where everything begins to falter. lucy still wears the necklace – as skull points out right at the beginning – and she even uses it to save them during a mission, but it’s the last time we see it. in fact, the very last time it’s mentioned is a scene where lucy is watching lockwood fondly; she touches her necklace out of reflex, and then he makes the decision that (as he will think later) ruined it all: to hire a new agent.

holly’s arrival is conflictuous for various reasons, notably MISCOMMUNICATION and JEALOUSY. remember what I said about annie’s necklace being a presage? yes, the prophecy is fulfilled! these two aspects almost led to lockwood and lucy’s ruin. however, in the end it wasn’t jealously that made them part, but very ironically it was their love. the “come off it, lucy, you know I’d die for you” was one more of lockwood’s not-so-subtle occasional demonstrations of how much he cared about her, but given the context, lucy was scared. because for the first time she realised lockwood really was committed to her, in his own way. the silver necklace was forgotten: their affection (which had been easy before) became heavy on lucy’s heart and conscience. she didn’t want his commitment like that. so she left, hoping that it would make it go away – and with that, leaving a hole in lockwood’s heart.

the creeping shadow tells us that their departure made it worse for both. and amusingly, even though this is one of the books with most deepening on locklyle, it’s the only one without a single quote from any necklace. why? because they’re confused. everything to them is nebulous and indistinct regarding the other. for the first time they’re beginning to acknowledge the fact they love each other, as they feel the effects of it directly on their skin, but they simply don’t have a proper conversation so they don’t know what the other is really thinking. lucy missed lockwood and co more than she would care to admit; she wanted to keep in touch with them, even if she was away for a good cause, but lockwood didn't make himself reachable in a way that wouldn't suggest his wish of her backing down from her decision. he fortified his walls again and became obsessed with a plan of getting her back no matter what, and only then he’d think of how he could earn her affection. I like to think that lockwood only realised he truly loved lucy in her absence; I imagine him lying awake at dawn repassing every conversation, every moment (especially the argument at the cafe); wondering when did it all begin to crumble and when was it he got so inattentive to her, sinking into new cases to run away from these feelings and to ironically have an illusion of self-control (add that to his trauma and consequent perspective that everyone he’s ever loved is taken from him). and somehow lucy is even more oblivious than him, so this moment is one of confusion and maybe even self-discovery for them. as a rule I wouldn’t gift someone a piece of jewelry meaning “hey so I’m a mess rn I kinda like u but idk? anyways lol let’s go to work”, therefore the lack of promises or anything like it. but when lucy comes back – and lockwood reaches the goal he had been planning all winter for – they are not the same anymore. their feelings didn’t change: they matured into something they still cannot name, but a lot more tangible than before.

at last comes the empty grave. after everything they’ve been through (see literally going to hell and back), though they haven’t officialy settled what they are to each other now, it’s clear to both of them that they’re not only coworkers, or simply friends. the shared trauma made them even closer than they were before, as lucy states here:

and this same shared trauma made lucy – with her self-consciousness and all that – doubt even more if lockwood truly loved her, or if it was something else. it’s fair; they hadn’t been on good terms for a while, he suddenly appeared on her doorstep again and then they nearly died together, now all of the sudden they couldn’t be apart?

of course their relationship would never be the same again, but all this situation just reinforced whatever affection they already had before. for once, lockwood was finally allowing himself a few moments of vulnerability around lucy (like when he showed her his family’s grave, or in that scene of quiet solace when he allows her to sit beside him in the library and he shares his theory about who killed his parents); but as stroud himself has said, “lockwood is a nightmare”, he never talks openly about his feelings.

so what does he do to declare that his love is true, tangible, eternal and devotional?

he gives her a necklace. again.

but this time, the act carries much more depth than before with the silver necklace, of which we don’t know much about in the books. because while that one was a reminder of someone dear to him, this one has its own story, a story that really touches lockwood inside. it represents his parents’ love, seen by him and his sister as an example since their childhoods. his father gave it to his mother as a symbol of his undying devotion. gold represents happiness, peace, stability – something lockwood and lucy did not have by the time he first tried to give her the necklace, since portland row was about to be attacked (and that’s why they were interrupted by kipps), while the last part of the book (paradoxically called “the beginning”) was the perfect moment to do so. the sapphire summarises everything lockwood wants to say out loud, but never does: it brings serenity and peace of mind, symbolises truth, restoration of balance, celestial hope, holiness and connection to the heavens.

this is lockwood's conception of the apex of love, and he is sharing it with lucy because she is the one that completes him, that makes his days have a meaning, the one with whom he wants to spend the rest of his life with. after five books, he is certain she is the one for him – and has always been. even when they didn’t know so.

and even after all this, lockwood doesn’t say it out loud, for fear of being rejected again. this moment is too important for him (he’s even put on his new coat I mean, honestly, just for a stroll?? he wanted to look good for her), and he didn’t want to ruin it. he hesitates, leaves the necklace there for lucy to find. rather than force her hand or try to influence her, as he had done before, he gives her a free choice. she can go for that stroll with him if she wants. she can also not go, if that’s what she wishes. if she wants the necklace, if she accepts him and his love, it will be her choice. he’s practically on his knees, begging her to say yes and accept him; he needs her, but he doesn’t want to impose himself on her: he wants her to choose him voluntarily. the necklace is a silent question. a proposal. and even though it took lucy the whole book, the whole series to realise that this love was real and mutual, she is ready. it’s not with hesitation that she says yes to him twice.

[and remember lockwood’s ring? the books begin and end with a necklace – tied ending! – and my theory is that the show might have intended on doing so as well. it all started with a ring and it would end with one, but a ring is a lot more clearer to read through the lens of romance. as of now, the show is constantly focusing on subtle hand touches – pride and prejudice fans howling –, which I found a rather suggestive detail, and at some point by the end, he would take it off his finger and put it into hers, an explicit exchange of vows, and my heart that has survived of only crumbs from jonathan until now found this change brilliant.]

so yeah, this is just one of the hundred reasons why I consider locklyle to be one of the deepest relationships ever written. good night, listeners, good night

[lucy-sky]

"Shame on me" with Shane please 😝

Also, thanks for sending one in for me! I'll see what I can do 😁

Sooo this was actually for 5 sentences from an imaginary fic thingy, but it's been so long since I got this message that I kinda felt obliged to write something a little more than that, you know, as a compensation :') I ended up with this silly horny 400-something words drabble, and it's far from being perfect because I haven't written anything for almost 6 months (I think it's the longest break I had since I started writing in 2018). But I'm surprised I managed to actually write something, like omg! I still can do it (kinda xD) Maybe inspiring reels from Amaya's insta helped, idk xDDD

So yeah, uh... Here we go :') Warnings: semi-public sex (not super graphic, but still)

That's it *runs away*

“Ah!.. Easy there, Walsh!..” you hiss as the man thrusts his hips into you with a particularly loud moan.

You’re in a storage room of the tiny corner shop where you work. Your back pressed against the rugged surface of the wall, the skirt of your dress shamelessly hiked up. Shane’s lips on the side of your neck, his nails digging into the flesh of your thigh. 

It wasn’t your plan. Probably it wasn’t his exact plan either, but here you both are, impatient like a couple of horny teenagers. You haven’t seen each other for a whole month. So far it’s the longest time you’ve been apart, and turns out you missed each other way more than you expected.

“C’mon, sweetheart,” he huffs against the shell of your ear. “You think she doesn’t know what we’re doin’ here, huh?” 

Shane talks about your colleague, and of course he’s right. You actually don’t worry about her very much - you trust each other. Normally it’s you who covers her all the time when she needs to leave earlier for another tinder date or something like that, so it's only fair she's covering you right now. But still… 

“Course she f-fucking knows,” you hiss breathlessly. “But… The customers don't…” 

“Nah, no one hears us, relax.”

You want to say something in reply, but can't help letting out a soft whine and instantly bite your lip as Shane hits exactly the right spot. 

“Shh, shh, that's it baby, I know you're close, c'mon, give it to me,” he murmurs in between the thrusts, picking up the pace, his lips capturing yours just in time to muffle another moan when you feel the knot inside you is about to burst. It hits you like a lightning strike, a warm wave of pure bliss washing all over you, making your back arch and your toes curl. Shane buries his face into the crease of your neck, breath hot and ragged, as he finally lets himself go as well.

The two of you are so blissed-out that you lose your balance for a moment.

“Ah, shit!” Shane groans as he bumps into a shelf stand and something falls from it with a loud thud. You both freeze in place when you hear your colleague knocking on the door.

“Ughhh, now they definitely heard us,” you mutter under your breath.

“Who cares?” he shrugs, trying to catch your lips with his once again.

“I care, actually. I mean… technically I can get fired for that. All because of you, idiot!”

“Well shit,” Shane chuckles before ducking his head to playfully bite on your exposed collarbone. “Shame on me, I guess.”

[vickyvicarious]

some scattered lucy thoughts from today...

Town is very pleasant just now, and we go a good deal to picture-galleries and for walks and rides in the park. As to the tall, curly-haired man, I suppose it was the one who was with me at the last Pop.

Aside from the 'oh this is all so boring' joke, this list of activities definitely points to Lucy being a very active person. Later on she also talks about other things she likes to do which support this. I think Lucy is a bubbly and outgoing/active person who usually has a lot of energy.

He has a curious habit of looking one straight in the face, as if trying to read one's thoughts. He tries this on very much with me, but I flatter myself he has got a tough nut to crack. I know that from my glass. Do you ever try to read your own face? I do, and I can tell you it is not a bad study, and gives you more trouble than you can well fancy if you have never tried it.

@dathen has a great more heartwrenching take on this line which I just reblogged, but in a more lighthearted direction I just love the image of Lucy making faces at herself in the mirror. I want so badly to see someone make cute art of it.

I do not, as you know, take sufficient interest in dress to be able to describe the new fashions. Dress is a bore. That is slang again, but never mind; Arthur says that every day.

Lucy doesn't care much about fashion. I kind of wonder if her mother cares more and always tries to ensure Lucy is in the latest fashions or whatever, and it's something she's lightheartedly complained about with Mina before. It feels like a familiar reference.

Also, Lucy seems like the type of person to have fun being caught up in new interests that people she likes enjoy. She finds it really fun to imitate Arthur's slang, and gets kinda proud about the idea of being an interesting psychological study, and that sort of thing. She is probably a really good listener. (And now I'm picturing Mina excitedly infodumping to Lucy as they walk along holding hands, Lucy listening with great interest. 10/10 date.)

But oh, Mina, I love him; I love him; I love him! There, that does me good. I wish I were with you, dear, sitting by the fire undressing, as we used to sit; and I would try to tell you what I feel. I do not know how I am writing this even to you. I am afraid to stop, or I should tear up the letter, and I don't want to stop, for I do so want to tell you all.

I have some thoughts about Lucy and speaking freely. I didn't notice how much emphasis is put on it, but when you're thinking about it specifically in those lines there is a lot going on here. It isn't just Mina who wants to be with Lucy where they can talk freely. Lucy feels the same. The way she starts the letter very politely avoidant about how much Arthur matters to her is probably much closer to how she speaks to most people about him, or even most things. She talks about trying to tell Mina how she felt, about not knowing how she's even saying all this, that she should stop, that she doesn't want to, she's writing this in a quick burst of emotion/courage. And sure, it could just be the overwhelming newness of her romantic feelings, but I think Lucy has a tendency to hide how she really feels if it would rock the boat or upset/worry people - regardless of the situation. You know, she acts like she is fine and happy even if she doesn't feel that way. And (vague hinted spoilers) the ability to speak freely specifically is something that has later relevance for both women, so I find it really interesting to see aspects of it in both their first letters.

I also think it's part of why she likes Arthur speaking slang (and later on another man speaking a different sort of slang) so much. It's more relaxed and individual and gives her a little thrill to deviate from more polite and proper scripts. It isn't something she does on her own, but if someone else initiates it's easier to join them. Or at the very least to enjoy listening to.

[astrangergivingthestrangewelcome]

Quincey, passing the time in the Afterlife: See it's really easy to survive being killed by plot all your have to do is be really unforgettable but relatively underdeveloped so people want to write for you + then have your death have no real narrative function so it's ridiculously easy to just make you be alive. It's all threesomes and mutual orgasms from there, and that's a cowboy tip.

Lucy, who has understandably become a hater: Well some of us aren't allowed to know what sex is despite being called a slut. No one is writing porn for Murray Mysteries me.

Renfield: actually I've found that your death can have narrative weight, but as long as it doesn't fuel the motivations of the other characters the Tumblr weirdos will find some way to make it work

Lucy: I didn't get to choose whether or not my death served a narrative and emotional function!!!

Captain + Crew of the Demeter: It could be worse. When your death motivates other characters at least they're thinking of you. When your death is for the character development of someone else you are entirely expendable.

Mr. Swales, who has stopped being a hater: Honestly, it was just nice to get to be included.

[mischievouslittlecreature]

I continue to be amazed at how I have literally indicated in every way I know how that Love Me Where I'm Most Ruined contains polyamory, and yet I STILL have people coming at me, getting mad at me over the story featuring polyamory.

[solidaritytek]

He Would Not Fucking Say That

Hi :) I come bearing some Promptis.

Link to AO3

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When Prompto’s friendship with Noctis was publicised, he knew he was going to get more attention than he could ever be prepared for. He’d been briefed by Ignis and Gladio shortly after it happened, both of them promising to ensure his safety. He still couldn’t wrap his head around the idea that people would care about him just because he was friends with Noctis. Even so, he knew it was bound to happen. Noctis was the prince, anybody in his immediate circle would have to deal with people trying to get to him through them.

However, nothing could ever prepare him for the shippers. He hadn’t even realised it was a thing until he stumbled upon it in the comments on his Instagram. Any posts with Noctis had to be pre approved by Ignis, but as long as they weren’t incriminating, it was usually fine. He had even said it was good for Noctis to be seen behaving like a normal citizen.

Prompto had been expecting his Instagram to blow up once people realised it existed, but the comments had been something else completely. How was he supposed to know that people would assume he and Noctis were dating?! They were just friends!

The comments were one thing. They were weird, sure. But he could deal with them. It was kind of nice to read the comments people left calling them cute, even if they were constantly assuming things about them.

What really got to him was the fanfiction. He had no idea it was even a thing until someone left a link on one of his posts, asking him what he thought about it. At first, he’d been hesitant to click on it. Whatever people did in their free time wasn’t any of his business, even if it was about him. 

Unfortunately, curiosity got the better of him. He’d told himself he would only read a little bit, just to see what it was about, and then he’d move on and pretend it never existed. It couldn’t hurt to check it out, right?

Oh how wrong he'd been.

As soon as he started reading, he got sucked in. The story wasn’t very long, just a few thousands words, but it completely captured his attention. He could tell it was amateur writing, but even so, he enjoyed it. He couldn’t stop the guilt that bubbled inside him reading about him and his best friend in a romantic context.

Despite the guilt, he found himself looking for more. He had no idea how Noctis would react if he found out, but he was sure it would probably end their friendship. He wondered if Noctis had any idea that this stuff existed, and if he did, had he read any of it?

Prompto was tempted to ask, but he was afraid. Noctis was his best friend; his only friend, really. He’d be lost if Noctis rejected him over it.

However, it turned out that he wasn’t the only one who read it.

He’d been sitting on Noctis’ couch, watching him play a game he couldn’t remember the name of when Noctis broke the silence.

“Did you know people write stories about us?” Noctis asked.

Prompto inhaled so sharply that he choked, coughing as he tried to catch his breath again.

“Do they?” He asked, once he was able to breathe again.

“Yeah, I saw a link on one of your posts and I was curious.”

“I mean… I knew people shipped us, but… isn’t it weird?”

Noctis shrugged. “A little. But it’s not real.”

“Right.”

“Besides, the characterization is all wrong.”

Prompto laughed. “You would not fucking say that.”